The Calm Before The Storm

Right now, I am still in the town I study in. I plan on moving Wednesday and have already moved part of my stuff. I wrote one exam today and will write another one Wednesday, but understandably I'm not very motivated to study. Once I've moved and am back home, I will have exactly two weeks until I get on a plane to my new life. Actually, I will only have 13 days, since I will arrive home late Wednesday and will have to leave for the airport early Thursday two weeks later.

As long as I am here, I still have a lot of time. There are numerous things I cannot organize yet and I can't do any of the packing yet either. My room here is already almost empty, all I basically have to do is put everything into my parent's car. It has been weird, today I went to dinner with one of my best friends and it was the last time that we really actually had time to talk. She might help me move a bit, but we will probably not see each other for a year after that. I really want to stay in touch with certain people from my life here, but I don't know what to expect as soon as I'm in California so it's hard to predict what will happen. I've been looking for a room in California, but so far nothing great has come up. It is really hard to find a room when I am here and the room is there.

As soon as I'm home, I will start going through all of my stuff, mostly my clothes and figure out what I'm throwing out, what I'm taking with me and what'll stay. I will be gone for about 10 months and I don't want to keep too much stuff if I'm not going to ever use it again. It will be hard to let go of certain things but I will try to not be too emotional, since the things will be in Austria and therefore out of my reach anyways. I will mostly keep winter clothing, since I don't need that in California - obviously - but I do plan on coming home for Christmas at least once in the next three years.

Normally, my life is very organized. I like making plans and lists and I am really bad at being spontaneous. Really, really bad. Right now, I cannot even plan ahead one month. I can think of all the things that I want, but I have no clue what they will exactly look like or even if I will have these things. I thought that when I got the acceptance email to college I'd be able to sleep better again, but so far I haven't been able to fall asleep at night at all because I have a million things going through my head. I really don't know what to expect and everything will change for me - way more than it did when I moved out.

I am certain that this was the right decision and I can't wait to start college and live my dream. But nonetheless, I'm a little anxious of how everything will work out in the next month. I expect problems and glitches, because you always have to expect those, but I just don't know what they will look like. I'm leaving my security net, that I've been living with for 21 years, behind. It is exciting, but also nerve-wracking. I guess we'll have to wait and see how everything turns out. I'm just not good at the patience-thing.